and more...

One of the beauties of dealing with addiction.

http://www.non-benzodiazepines.org.uk/clonazepam.html

and

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Benzodiazepine_withdrawal_syndrome

yay.

more fun with "R"

So, "R"... she gets out...  charges dropped.  The guy who dragged her, choked her, hit her (I've seen the black eye)...  is out on bail and confused.  Maybe he doesn't remember?  Alcohol and drugs can do that... I am not sure what's what there.  Police report seems to bear out her story.

She cannot go back where she was assaulted, and is now without a place to crash.  There's a congress critter type who says "even if they didn't deserve, it... (regarding rape)", but I'm not going there.  IT's just wrong.  Period.  Come after me with a gun, a knife, large scissors... and I might feel the need to defend myself.  But verbal abuse?  You've got to be out of your mind.  Not for anyone am I going to lose my temper like this fool.

She gets a summons to a court-date for custody of her kids, and no-one bothered to give her a heads-up...  and... the court finds her unfit to care for her kids.  Which sucks.

So the usual restraining order bull to keep the guy away, and she goes to meetings...  comes home and gets wound up (sp?) telling me it's my fault.  What?

So, long story short... she gets abusive; I tell her she has to go to her car if she's not going to cool off... and she demands to be allowed to watch a DVD of her choosing.  I say "no" unless she calms down... which doesn't get heard, and she gets more and more strident.

I repeat the request to chill, or she goes outside... and she informs me that she's not going anywhere, she's a resident. I call a California licensed therapist, who spent her career placing kids (I think) for the county... and get told that "She" is out of control, (based upon the ranting which therapist can hear in the background)... and tells me to call PET for an intervention.
(That means cops.  Again).
"R" gets even more upset, and leaves before police arrive .... and they cannot find her.

Yay.  I should have just let her watch tv.

273.5 a -- the fun continues.

Friday, I got a frantic call from my friend/ex-gf...
She got into it with her roommate(s).  Not me.  (yay).

She texted me "Emergency".  I texted back "Call 911", because I've already been dragged through the drama. Turns out she wasn't kidding.

Police were called, and she and he... were both arrested.  Kids went to DCFS
Now.  I feel guilty.  Not very guilty, I didn't create the situation; but I didn't help, either.
ALL my friends have said "dump this person" and run away quickly.

But, how do you help a troubled person otherwise?

The state of california doesn't.  They turf the mentally-ill downtown by skid row, and roust them from anywhere they camp...

I cannot bail her out, it's too much money to risk.  Maybe if I wasn't in debt ...

and I feel terrible for the kids.

And as summer ends... so does work, renters and the "GF".

I just should expect it...

The company that employs most of my time, is going to fold up.  Or, at least that is what we think this week.

The downstairs roommate, faced with the challenge of paying the rest of the current month's rent, and providing next month... decided he would do MUCH better closer to work; and moved out in such a hurry that he left his food behind... I guess he thought that there would be confrontation or something...?

I vehemently broke up with the dating object, bed partner, GF who can't keep it together long enough to have a discussion.  IT's all my fault... so now she's not talking to me.  Yay.
I won't let her move in if she is going to go off on me; that's not acceptable.  And, she cannot (will not?) control herself and I won't allow that level of discord.  I haven't really lost my temper in 20 years, and I'm not going to start now.  I just don't like being screamed at.

And it's hot...

Brewer's Yeast when Sometimes, a good idea goes bad...

So, one of my roommate/friends had a bright idea.

He's taking Brewer's Yeast as a dietary supplement.  Well, he's inventive and found that the pet food supply houses (Red Barn, et al) stock it in larger quantity and at a much cheaper price; about half or less of the cost of the regular human-consumable variety.

He calls the manufacturer and finds out that the stuff is made to acceptable clean standards (meaning that it's not certified, but prepared in a way that isn't immediately objectionable)...

So, off he goes and buys about four (4) containers of the stuff.

Brewers Yeast, 2 Lb (Animed) (001019)

$5.56 3 stores

No reviews yet. Be the first!

• Brand: Animed
• Health and Safety Type: Vitamins and Supplements

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yeast

Brewers Yeast, 2 Lb (Animed) (001019)

Rich source of the b-complex vitamins, protein, and minerals, particularly chromium.Supplies all the essential amino acids and chromium for a pets diet.Used as an aid to good health and development in pets of all ages.100% natural source of high quality vitamins.Natural source of all the essential amino acids.Brewers Yeast Powder Amino Acids/Chromium.

He was very proud of his new cost-saving health measure.

Then... he sees this article in the Atlantic:
 http://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2013/05/yeast-love-and-fear-death-and-beer/275786/

Yeast: Love and Fear, Death and Beer

Single-celled fungi all around us do so much good and so much bad.

JOHN-MANUEL ANDRIOTEMAY 13 2013, 10:35 AM ET

o o o
"Fink said that in biotech applications S. cerivisiae, ordinary bread yeast, is preferable to E. coli not only because it reproduces prolifically, but because it's safe. Even after using it to produce the viral antigens used in vaccines, "you can feed it to animals," he said. Because literally thousands of pounds of yeast can be produced from a small batch, Fink added, "You can get a pretty penny for Saccharomyces" by selling the excess that isn't needed."

So, he's been eating yeast that was used to produce What exactly...?
let me spell it out:
Vaccines
Insulin
Hormones?

oh my...

how do I say it...

Let's see if I can make some sense.

on Monday you got drunk and became very abusive that was kind of scary.  Not only were you verbally abusive, but you were hitting me trying to get to my roommate to hit him.  Fortunately, you don't have much (*any*) in the way of martial arts training.

On Friday I wanted to take the boxes out of the room to get ready for the kids, and you insisted that you and your babysitter would do it Saturday morning.  Saturday , when I wanted to take the boxes down to the garage so we could sort them and get them out of the room you told me if I touched them you would call the police and you would have me arrested for pushing you down the stairs. I still don't know where you got that from.

My friend called me on his way back from Los Angeles and you forbade me to let him in the building. you told me he was a rapist and that you did not trust him.

You also told my roommate you thought I was a rapist...

When I went outside to talk to him, you called him on the phone and threatened him if he. came inside.

My friend and I talked for awhile and I called the Los Angeles City District Attorney's Office. The district attorney advised us to talk to the watch commander. the watch commander said the only thing I could do is ask you to leave. I called and asked dispatch for a police supervisor who is the gentleman that woke you up
When the police took you outside, you told them that I was abusing you, and that I had pushed you down the stairs.

The reason I had to remove you is because I did not want you to have me arrested. And I believed you when you said that you would do just that. Whether you acknowledge it, remember it or not you provided a significant threat to me and my safety.

And yes I could have handled it better but I don't know how.

It's a disease...

I'm only going to be slightly sarcastic here; an alcoholic cannot *help* what they are, it's a disease and they don't get a pass like the rest of us who don't need to drink (insert whatever variation on "stuck in the behaviour" you want)...

And... Abused people don't get fixed, you can't do anything for them except offer support and stay out of the way (not adding more roadblocks); because YOU CANNOT FIX PEOPLE.,  THEY EITHER FIX THEMSELVES OR NOT.

I'll say it again.  You cannot fix anyone.  If they don't do it themselves, it won't happen.  You can contain the damage by not being there, that's all.

TANSTAFFL revisted

I hate it when my friends are right, and I'm proven wrong...

Especially when I have such personal hopes.

Oh well.  It ain't life if there are no bumps in the road.

I am trying to help a new friend (and gf), and it's proving difficult.  You can't change someone, they either are who they are... or they modify on their own.  All you can do is not get in the way.

Period.

I just wish I could... just this once... shine a light that gets seen.

Requim, again... Pippi Longstocking Cat. 1997 - 3/17/2013

Today I said goodby to another good friend.  Pippi was a small cat with a big heart.

She arrived (accounts vary) sometime in 1997, she and another cat and her former owner moved in August 2001, and she's been here ever since.  The ex - fiance'; long since gone but the two cats remained..

Pippi was so skittish, she'd only approach you if you had been lying down still for a few minutes... and you couldn't really pet her; she would disappear.

Over time, she discovered wet food, sashimi and steak; and found her voice.  She was my shoulder cat, loved to perch on my right while I was working or watching TV or a video.  

Pippi had a little burring purr; with a hint of a chirp in it...  especially when you scratched her behind the ear, or under the chin.  She also had these amazingly sharp (think surgical steel) tiny claws that would go into skin through shirt and tee, especially when she determined that she was NOT getting down... 

She spent almost all of her time on top of the 85 gallon fish tank, I went through towels trying to keep her dry and off the lamps (the main reason for the perch).   She didn't "Play" with string, ball or feathers... but you could see her watching everything from her perch on high.  Also I think she liked the vantage point, and it was warm and moist during the cold winter nights.  She could jump the requisite 5 1/2 feet straight up the side of the tank; and only needed "stepladder" assistance (a chair and a multi-drawer cabinet) recently as she got older and more infirm. About the last 5 years she had a mild form of leukemia that affected her intestines, so part of the ritual was to feed her medication to make her guts quiet and allow her to digest what she had eaten.  

She was extremely vocal (siamese yowl) when she wanted my attention, and would happily climb from the floor to my shoulder by any means convenient.  If I was sitting, she might be amenable to my lap...  or any odd bits of raw fish I might be eating at the time.

She got weaker a couple months ago, and injured her rear knee and hip.  It wasn't as much fun as before to jump places, and the last week she got a bladder infection, rapidly declined and her quality of life became debatable.  

She still managed a morsel of good steak this morning; and she passed with some gentle help from the doctor at 11:57am on this Sunday.  

My universe has lost another tiny bright light...

Pippi Longstocking Cat.  1997 - 3/17/2013
Renee gave me this in email last night... 6/1/2013

Dating folk with problem(s). Don't we all have?

The Mom is doing much better, we have a plan to get her through these tough spots.  She's going to be trained in Chicago in a couple weeks, so it is somewhat more important to get this done.  Time is...

Am I dreaming or what...?  We will see.  One can hope.

And, now we have a storage unit reserved, a weekend of moving fun planned (yea...) and I'm on the hook to host her for a few weeks until a paycheck arrives.

Meanwhile....

Klonopin (clonazepam) and dating

Wow.  I just sent off two darling kids (2 years and 4 years) to the keeping of their dad, because Mom just got checked in for a Psych eval.  A 24-72 hour hold, I don't know yet, this is new to me.
Apparently (guessing -- I'm not a medical professional), either the mix wasn't right; or there are additional twists that aren't getting addressed with the current cocktail. I don't know.
What I do know, is that she needed help, the kids needed safekeeping, and I'm going to be the bad guy because I called the state protective services, and they said "Call 911.  Call them now".

The kids are safe, the gal is in hospital... and hopefully will get sorted out.

I'm not whining, not really.  I'm just sad becase there is so little I can do to help, and the problem(s) are so major.  But I'm still going to take it on the chin.

musings of the idle not-so-rich

I don't write as often as I did.  Among other things, it's become both more difficult and now *easier* than it was before.  Now since google has linked the accounts, I have to disconnect one persona and introduce the other in order to write here.  That's a PITA.  However... once figured out; it's really pretty simple.

I have a new friend.  Well, this started slightly before December, and then I ran away... (she's got issues).  But, apparently my telling her helped her decide to stay more on course and produce less drama.  Well, at least that appears to be the current situation.  We will see. I'm not holding my breath, got over that with the last few who went complete Nut-Job on me. (you know who you are).

karma may win out; I hope G*d is kinder to them than that...

So, tonight a BBQ dinner at Lenny's BBQ on Valley Circle in Chatsworth area, and now home for a nice Irish whiskey in a snifter (yes, I am that upper-crust -- LOL).  And reflections upon where I am and what I've accomplished.

So, I'm still in my condo, the cats are still fed and Pippi is upstairs purring about a morsel of ribeye (mostly fat) that she's consumed... and I still hope to bring her weight back up somewhat.  (She's at 4 lbs, down for 4 lbs and 10 ounces... which is much closer to her healthy weight than at present).

But, we all can do only what we can do.  I can hope, right...?


only time will tell.