Mea maxima culpa (again).

I failed my friend.  (She returned the favour).

Yesterday my friend and roommate cleaned the house.  This is one of the ways she showed her appreciation for the roommate situation.  Since she cannot accept charity in any form, she MUST trade...
Because her significant Ex- has returned; she's been stressing about whether or not to see him again.  She hasn't seen him since she fled last year.  They have a tumultuous relationship, and she's not good when someone beats her which she told me he did.  It is part of her past, and she doesn't deal well when she thinks it will re-occur.

So, she decided to get drunk.  I, in an extremely stupid moment, decided to accompany her (so that she wouldn't wander off... (like to skid row or Bikini Girls Bar somewhere in Orange...)) to the bar.  I should have said "HELL NO" or at least tried to keep her from going.

Bartender Brian, random guy named Matthew on the next barstool over.
She orders doubles at the bar, starts flirting / making out with the next guy on the stool over, and I'm as usual at a loss.  Two beers for me, and three doubles for her; and she invites him back to my home (hers also) for dinner.  She exits, he tells me that I should get her home... He said "she's getting weird".

So, I go outside and think she's going to walk home with me.  She wants the guy to come; and I tell her he declined... so she crosses the boulevard *into traffic* and I follow, holding her purse.  She tells me to  F* off, and crosses back, grabs a guy across the street and heads east. She falls down, I cross over (I think I got this part right) and she spews invective at me when I tell her that she asked me to remind her of the women in the rehab she left a couple weeks ago.

I slapped her.  Two beers and a bit of her drink still doesn't excuse it...

That is the one thing that absolutely won't fly.  And it's my fault. If I hadn't gone with her to the bar, and had not drank the beer, hadn't followed her back across the street, and hadn't slapped her; I would be fine.  She'd be f*d, but I'd be clean at least.

I betrayed her trust.

A couple of interested parties who happened to be hanging at the outdoor bar, came over to tell us to chill out. One I think was an under-cover cop by identifying his ride...

I called the police (911) told them I slapped her,  and waited while she continued to tell me to leave; (because I know if I don't report it and she does... ) and the police didn't come.  After a half hour... I called them back at dispatch, and said I was going home; if they wanted to collect my statement there.

Once I walked home ALONE, I went upstairs to the bathroom to do the necessary, gathered up a couple glasses on the sink and the empty bottle from the trash; and started walking down the stairs.

She was there (surprise!) just below the landing I was standing on, holding a kitchen knife.  I literally froze, either I grabbed her or she swung,  and I fell and/or she lost her balance and fell, and I found myself on the kitchen floor; I landed on my head and ass (judging by how much my tailbone hurts today).  She either followed me down, or I pulled her down with me when I fell; and she was biting my face when I landed.  I'm confused.

Blood everywhere. 

She was yelling at me, and putting a towel tourniquet on my arm... then I think she removed my belt.
I took out my phone and called 911 and said I've been cut, and my address.  She's yelling at the dispatcher to hurry, because I'm bleeding.
And I'm dizzy.
I wondered why she was yelling.

Police came, EMTs came, somehow she made my belt the tourniquet because the EMTs had trouble removing it and I got loaded into an ambulance.
I was nauseous the whole way.

My other roommate told me that she was taken away in handcuffs.

I don't have any way to apologize, and more to the point... I'm not sure how I can.

I'm pretty sure the DA will come back with domestic-assault for me; it's kinda expected.  Sucks, but then again...

I'm not sure what will happen to her.

But I failed.  I knew of the triggers.

Frustration and fear

My friend apparently fell off the wagon again.  And yesterday, that looks like it might include the other recreational substance.  Damm.

I think she reached out to the wrong friend.

I bet she lies... but
I was hoping.

And I'm reminded of the cartoon "Mother Goose and Grimm"

"Tomorrow I get to poop again".

I can't find the picture at the moment, but Grimm is standing there (he's a dog), with a pleased look on his face....

Mom's feeling better, Now we see if it continues.



https://www.google.com/search?q=www.grimmy.com+images

Sunrise... Sunset... once more around the steeple

I was checking in with my sister about the flight (for her wedding), and she told me that Mom is in the hospital again.   Now, Mom is 97 so it's not a big surprise; but she was doing very well.
This happens I suppose, but it isn't something I like to contemplate.

My friend just lost their husband; and another friend in the same group is probably going to lose his father.  And this doesn't make me feel good about it.

I've got a flight scheduled, but now it might change...  and I'm scared/sad.

I just checked in, and my sister said Mom is asleep... so I'll check back later.

hope...