Another day's energy uselessly spent...Requiem (I hope)

Funny. I miss talking to my "friend", but not enough to risk communications with her. I feel guilty that I had to chase her out; and yet... it wasn't even remotely possible to continue having her as a guest... wtf? Why should I feel anything but relief? At least now the nightmares will fade... (my brain plays a lot of "what-if" daydream sequences when I'm dropping off, and just before I wake up)... and these were unpleasant.

But, I need to find my *focus* so that I can do the coursework. Otherwise, the effect will be greatly magnified by killing a semester to the tune of ... thanks Calif ... say $3000. or so? (I have to check, kinda lost track in all the flurry of disasters)...